Laura thinks this story is scary, but it's really just funny.

I think I've been in a pretty oblivious state of mind recently. For whatever reason, I seem to be trapped in my own head more than usual, which in my case is significant. There is a lot going on right now that merits thinking seriously about - a sign of a fulfilling life - but it is getting to the point where I need to just "live" rather than continually analyze the process of living.

While on the topic of being TOTALLY oblivious to the world around me.... There's this crazy man who habitually loiters in and around the Dupont Circle metro, jacked up on maybe fifteen kinds of substance, who has this crafty little trick of riding the metro back and forth, claiming to need just enough money to get off. He wanders around yelling "One more dollar! Just one more dollar! Please people, can you give me a quarter? One quarter? I've gotta get off this train..." etc. Thing is, he ALWAYS needs "just one more dollar," and I have witnessed this little ploy several times before. Pretty clever, really. I bet if he were marginally less irritating, though, he'd get a lot more.

Anyway, last Thursday, I happened to be on his car in the metro (just my luck), and due to a lot of factors (me being tired, frustrated, hungry, and eager to get home after Arabic class, to name a few) it was just not the right time for me to be dealing with Mr. Nutcase. I consciously decided to ignore him and in order to drown out his steady banter, I turned up my iPod and started blankly out the window into the dark tunnel. (Yes, rude, I know, but then bad moods often trump civility, sad as that may be.)

After a couple of minutes lost in my own train of thought, I notice that the guy is standing RIGHT behind me, no longer chanting "a quarter? a quarter? anyone?..." but instead, something more like "Ma'am, ma'am, it's following you! That's what happens, it's gonna get you. Gonna get you, ma'am, gonna get you." He's grating my nerves at this point, so I pointedly don't turn around until, after maybe thirty seconds, I notice out of the corners of my eye that people are staring at me. Like, everyone in the train is looking at me, and since there's a crazy person behind me (which would normally command far more attention than little ole me) it dawns on me that something is up.

Finally, two people tap my shoulder, and gesture to my hand, upon which a two-inch long, bright red cockroach is perched. It's clearly been chillaxin' there for, oh, you know, long enough for people to notice. I think I pretty suavely shook it off (it landed on the next guy over, who was way more freaked out than I was), and luckily, was able to save some face and escape when the doors opened at my stop a second later (saved by the bell). How it escaped my attention that there was a COCKROACH on me for over a minute, especially when a crazyman is loudly pointing out that same fact to the ENTIRE train, is completely beyond me. But there you go. Living in my own world these days.